Women & Guns

gunner · Joined: 04 Jul 2006 Posts: 1743 Location: vermont

that has got to be the stupidest idea i've heard in a long lifetime, (fill in much salty language here) that guy needs a full wall to wall counseling session, asap, and the advice to the wife to get a lawyer and start divorce proceeding is good too as a next step. there's a big difference between teaching a woman, wife, girlfriend or whatever proper caution and protective measures, including how and when to use a gun, and scaring her to death. she needs that bumwipe out of her life, forthwith.
"gunner"
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OD_GREEN · Joined: 14 May 2006 Posts: 119 Location: USA

That is the most awsome way to verify the law of unintended consequenses.

and

sounds like a great way for someone to get shot

cush · Joined: 03 May 2006 Posts: 221 Location: CA

Funny, the general comments are on how bad any idea this is for safety and emotional distress, and I agree.
What triggered my eyebrows was the feeling I got of how he relates to his wife. Scare her, then "lecture", oh those are fine relationship tools. Rolling Eyes

Kind of seems like he's bad at communicating, or feels he lost the argument, so he has to put himself back on top so to speak.
Lecture, never. Advice very carefully if asked. (The exception is safety advice, always but very carefully.) Generally in the form of discussion , of the theory and the various sources for more information.
I try very hard not to "instruct" the DW. Granted we all have our areas of expertise. If I wanted to sew anything I ask the DW for advice (and assistance, so of course she usually simply takes over Very Happy

, but popped buttons are my problem Sad

).
But I wouldn't expect a lecture. And since I would hardly call myself a self defense expert, we are fortunate to have found some good true experts for training. I could go on but on this board I believe I'm "preaching to the choir".
Now certain other boards I might get a negative reaction from a vocal (caveman? naw that disrespects the cavemen) moronic (has a better flow to it) minority.
-cush

Annie · Joined: 31 Mar 2006 Posts: 2236 Location: Indiana

This is just bugging the bejeebus out of me.
Pax, what are you going to tell him?
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pax · Joined: 18 Jul 2006 Posts: 304 Location: WA state

Annie, here's the sad part: I get the same basic question at least once every couple-three months, from different guys. No, I'm not kidding. Usually I just tell them that's a bad idea for safety reasons, and also point out that if their wife (or daughter or sister or girlfriend ...) has any grit in her gut at all, she'll never forgive him for it -- and that if she hasn't got any grit, it won't do any good anyway.

As I said in the opening post and truly believe, these questions don't often come from really bad people. They come from people who are well meaning but frustrated at their inability to "MAKE" someone else see the world the way they do themselves. So no matter how ridiculously stupid and just plain wrong the idea is, I still usually try to handle telling them so as gently as I can.

pax
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lady colt · Joined: 21 Jun 2007 Posts: 52 Location: NORTH CAROLINA

I can't even believe that anyone would try something like that to someone they love. Someone needs to give him a good @ss reaming he is a real idiot if his wife ever found out what he wanted to do she would leave his sorry butt.
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Annie · Joined: 31 Mar 2006 Posts: 2236 Location: Indiana

pax · Joined: 18 Jul 2006 Posts: 304 Location: WA state

Annie, I don't blame you a bit. Feel the same way, in fact.

I just keep telling myself: flies, honey, vinegar ... you know the deal there.

Next time maybe I'll just give him a link to this thread. Muahahhaha.

pax
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My website: www.corneredcat.com
Buy my book! Lessons from Armed America, with Mark Walters

Poker88 · Joined: 04 Dec 2007 Posts: 293 Location: MI

Road Warrior · Joined: 25 Aug 2007 Posts: 1668 Location: Michigan

redjeepgirl · Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2008 9:55 am Post subject: Re: Why do they?

I'm thinking the guy has some sort of whacked out fantasies of his own he needs to work on. If she doesn't want to carry, doesn't feel the need to carry, that is her choice and it should be respected. Not everyone has the right mindset, you can't force that. Makes me sick, and if someone did that to me before I carried, I'd prolle have had a reason to get a gun and end up behind bars. :/

scooterthegreat · Joined: 10 Nov 2006 Posts: 351 Location: La Crosse, WI

So she doesn't want to shoot someone. No matter what we all say about self defense, not every one can. I think we pretty much accept that. So instead of alienating here by forcing her to do something she "can't" or just "won't"... Why not help her find another way to defend herself? Who knows, maybe as she goes through all the other forms of self defense, she will learn that perhaps learning to use a firearm may not be so bad.
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JenRN · Joined: 01 Feb 2008 Posts: 109

Scaring her is definately NOT the way! He should tell her to watch the news. They only report an INKLING of what actually happens!

I've treated thousands of victims who never thought it would happen to THEM! He should have his wife visit this forum and read the experiences of others who post here!

Of course she doesn't WANT to shoot anyone! Nobody in their right mind does! Sometimes thru no fault of our own we're FORCED into situations totally beyond our control. Situations where our only options go from bad to worse. This guy should ask his wife what she'd want a friend to do in a situation where only her friend or the goblin could survive.

Scaring his wife could literally cause her to have a heart attack! Theres a lot of things he obviously didn't think about. I'm glad he's not my husband. I'd have to go out and get a new frying pan!
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kaintuck · Joined: 20 Jan 2008 Posts: 158 Location: USA!

just wrong! Evil or Very Mad

never scare a person for fun..........it would be like 'shooting over someones head for fun'.......
my fourth grade teacher told me..."nobody ever does anything they don't want to".........so if someone won't carry a gun....then that's their choice!

as for the 'jokester' husband in this.....WOW i can't think how stupid this is sounding to 'scare' his girl...... Evil or Very Mad

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chickenmama · Joined: 08 Mar 2008 Posts: 2 Location: Minnesota

if he wants to "scare" her, all he would have to to is pull up the multitude of newspaper articles and police reports, with full gory details of rape and robbery, and have her read them, if she will. then give her all the reports of all the many women who have sucessfully defended themselves with a firearm. hopefully she chooses to be wise, and learns how to defend herself (if not with a firearm, at least with mace, knives, martial arts, ripping out the offender's jugular with her own teeth). hopefully she learns before a real attact on her person, and doesn't continue to think "it won't happen to me". the "gentleman" in question may be something of an a**h***, but give him a drop of credit for being concerned for her safety - really horrible idea, maybe some good intention.